"Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."

Nothing will be accomplished if you do not learn to shift your internal states.  I could give you the blueprint for success and fulfillment.  You could believe every part of it, yet if you can't get yourself to do what you even know is right - it matters not!

This has been a struggle for me to understand for decades.  We know what to do but we don't want to do it.  Different parts of our brain are at odds.

There are many tools in the tool house to overcome this.  I especially would love to hear from you if you have found some new tools we don't have listed so please do reach out to us in the Contact Us section!

When dealing with the inner world it can be tricky.  One part of your brain knows this is good for you, another part of your brain is kind of like - hey I just don't wanna do this.  It all has to do with your inner state.  So perhaps priming yourself BEFORE you try and do something is key.  The other part I've noticed is of course how you look and feel towards something.  

If the idea of doing something brings you pain or displeasure or fear you are less likely to do it.  If this is the case you should slowly and systematically and perhaps daily learn to choose to go towards that thing and inoculate yourself to the fear or anxiety.

I would also say that when dealing with the inner world you should start to recognize when you need to FORCE and when you need to NUDGE.  

Sometimes FORCE has the opposite effect.  Sometimes NUDGE works better over time.  Nudge yourself to start a daily habit.  Sometimes you need to FORCE and drag yourself kicking and screaming to do something.  Sometimes you just need to force yourself to START or put the damn thing in front of you and cause and effect takes place and you get lost in it.  There are no hard or fast rules.  Yet.

On activity priming.  For instance I have noticed that going for a brisk walk before my writing or work sessions help to get me in the right level of awareness or intensity.   Becoming mindful of what intensity state you are in on the inside is a good start.  Perhaps the first step is just to get to the next level... like get out of bed.  Perhaps you need more sleep!  Your the boss.  But over time learning how to self regulate internal states is probably the thing that has made me richest in life....

It is to be able to more consciously be the author of the meaning around you.  The bad things don't sting as bad, the random thoughts that make you feel bad can be sorted away in a neat little pile in the corner and understood.  What other people say does not impact you for as long.  Even when bad things happen you can NUDGE yourself to start to see them in a true way rooted in reality as part of the growing process.  It all lends itself.  Above all else I wish this gift onto you and mankind - because it helps to remove so much of the unnecessary suffering.  It's like we finally learn the controls to the video game character that is us (metaphorically).  Interna world and external world working together to promote life and well being.

Writing is this amazing tool to help me make sense of it all.  Sometimes I don't know what I'm going to write until I sit down and start to lay out ideas.  But it's been so instrumental to self regulation.  It's like talking to your best friend and venting but your best friend is you. I hope you find this gift one day my friends and Mateo and Isabella by beautiful children.

A rich man is the one that realizes what he has.

The Tool Bag!!!

Cognitive Techniques:

• Cognitive Reframing: Adjust how you interpret a situation. For instance, instead of seeing a challenge as a threat, view it as an opportunity to learn.
• Mindfulness and Meditation: Stay in the present moment without judgment. This can reduce rumination and help manage emotions.
• Positive Self-talk: Counteract negative thoughts by consciously choosing positive affirmations or more balanced thoughts.

Emotion Regulation Techniques:

• Breathing Techniques: This can activate the parasympathetic nervous system, leading to a calmer state.
• Progressive Muscle Relaxation: Tense and relax different muscle groups in sequence to release physical tension and bring your awareness to different places.
• Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) or Tapping: This combines cognitive restructuring with tapping on certain meridian points.
• Visualization: Imagine a calming or happy place or situation to change your emotional state.

Behavioral Techniques:

• Physical Activity: Exercise releases endorphins, which are natural mood lifters.
• Engage in a Hobby: Activities you enjoy can act as a distraction and mood booster.  Perhaps something you know usually adds energy to your system.
• Break Tasks into Steps: If overwhelmed, breaking tasks into manageable steps and focusing on one thing at a time can be helpful.

Physiological Techniques:

• Sleep and Rest: Ensure you're getting enough sleep, as fatigue can exacerbate negative inner states.
• Diet: Eat a balanced diet to stabilize blood sugar and provide essential nutrients, which can impact mood and energy.
• Avoid Stimulants: Reduce or eliminate caffeine and sugar intake if they exacerbate anxiety or mood swings.

Social Techniques:

• Talk to Someone: Sometimes, just sharing how you feel can help. Consider talking to a trusted friend or a professional.
• Join a Group: Engaging in group activities or support groups can provide a sense of belonging and understanding.

Environmental Techniques:

• Change Your Environment: Sometimes a change in scenery or ambiance, even briefly, can shift your perspective and mood.
• Listen to Music: Music can be a powerful tool to change your inner state.

Establish Routines: Routines can provide a sense of normalcy, predictability, and structure, which can be grounding.

Set Boundaries: It's essential to know your limits and communicate them effectively to avoid feeling overwhelmed or resentful.

Don't be afraid to seek professional help: If changing your inner state becomes particularly challenging or persistent, consider consulting with a psychologist, therapist, or counselor OR write to us your question or issue!! We will try to help or may even invite you to join our podcast.  Therapists and counselors are all different.  If one doesn't work try another or another!

Remember, it's normal for inner states to fluctuate. However, the key is to recognize when you're in an undesired state and use the above tools to navigate back to a more positive or balanced state.   It's a lifetime journey so have patience with yourself.  Consistent effort over time almost never loses.  Also, everyone is unique; what works for one person might not work for another, so it's important to find what's effective for you personally.

For the most difficult things sometimes the simplest answer is:  Discipline.

Look at David Goggins though.  The ability to do things that are difficult arises from how you play your inner game. There is Just Do It. But I think we can do better.  David is able to accomplish amazing things because of how he is able to reframe.

What you anchor and compare yourself to is key. What you believe is possible is key. You will be your own biggest limiting belief.   Another part of your brain will tell you no - this is too much.  You need to stop. It will try and rationalize a way out of doing the difficult thing.  

What are you comparing yourself to?  This defines the standard.  

On the flip side regardless of how you feel if you do the thing you will net the results.  You need a plan.  You need the ability to execute that plan consistently.  Your internal states are everything.  Your inner game is everything.

In addition you may want to ask and address: Are you prepared to be wrong?  Because you could be holding yourself back.

Who are you on the inside?  The truth is you are an amalgamation of different parts of your brain.  Your EGO is there for a reason.  It's there to help you to survive and procreate.

Positive Traits or Elements of the Human Ego:

1. Self-awareness: Recognizing one's strengths, weaknesses, desires, and motivations.
2. Reality testing: Ability to accurately assess the external world and differentiate between reality and fantasy.
3. Regulation and control: Helps manage impulses and make reasoned decisions.
4. Assertiveness: Helps individuals stand up for their rights and express feelings and thoughts.
5. Resilience: Allows individuals to bounce back from setbacks.
6. Initiative: Drives individuals to act and move forward.
7. Self-esteem: Helps individuals value themselves and their worth.
8. Motivation: Drives individuals to achieve and accomplish goals.
9. Boundary setting: Helps define personal limits and protect oneself from being mistreated.

Negative Traits or Elements of the Human Ego:

1. Egocentrism: Excessive concern with oneself, believing that one is the center of everything.
2. Narcissism: Excessive admiration and fascination with oneself; a high level of self-importance.
3. Defensiveness: Resisting feedback or criticism, even when it's constructive.
4. Rigidity: An inability to change one's mind or adapt to new situations.
5. Control obsession: Needing to control everything and everyone around, leading to domineering behavior.
6. Arrogance: Feeling superior to others.
7. Entitlement: Feeling that one deserves special treatment or privileges without reason.
8. Envy: Feeling discontented or resentful of someone because of their possessions, qualities, or luck.
9. Denial: Refusing to recognize or confront problematic behaviors, feelings, or situations.

Mahatma Gandhi: "You must be the change you want to see in the world."

Lao Tzu: "When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be."

Wayne Dyer: "Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change."

Buddha: "All that we are is the result of what we have thought."

Viktor E. Frankl: "When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves."

Anais Nin: "We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are."

C.S. Lewis: "You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending."

Maya Angelou: "If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude."

Marcus Aurelius: "The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts."

Nelson Mandela: "As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison."

Carl Jung: "Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate."

Eckhart Tolle: "Awareness is the greatest agent for change."

Deepak Chopra: "Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way, ask if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future."

Socrates: "The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new."

Louise Hay: "Every thought we think is creating our future."

Michael Jordan: "If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, then you never will change the outcome."

George Bernard Shaw: "Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything."

James Baldwin: "Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced."

Shakti Gawain: "When we consistently suppress and distrust our intuitive knowingness, looking instead for authority, validation, and approval from others, we give our personal power away."

Dalai Lama: "The goal is not to be better than the other man, but your previous self."

Paulo Coelho: "When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too."

Robert Louis Stevenson: "Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant."

Oscar Wilde: "Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."

Henry David Thoreau: "Things do not change; we change."

Tony Robbins: "If you do what you've always done, you'll get what you've always gotten."

William James: "The greatest discovery of any generation is that a human can alter his life by altering his attitude."

Epictetus: "It's not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters."

Carl Rogers: "The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change."

Pema Chödrön: "To be fully alive, fully human, and completely awake is to be continually thrown out of the nest."

Molière: "The greater the obstacle, the more glory in overcoming it."

Stephen R. Covey: "If you want to make minor changes in your life, work on your attitude. But if you want to make significant, quantum breakthroughs, work on your paradigms."

Swami Vivekananda: "We are what our thoughts have made us; so take care about what you think. Words are secondary. Thoughts live; they travel far."

Ram Dass: "The quieter you become, the more you can hear."

Viktor E. Frankl: “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

 The brain is a highly complex organ, and while we've made significant advancements in our understanding of its structure and function, there's still much to learn. Here's a simplified overview of the major parts of the brain and their commonly accepted functions based on current scientific understanding:

1. Cerebrum: This is the largest part of the brain, responsible for higher cognitive functions.
   • Frontal Lobe: Involved in decision-making, problem-solving, judgment, and motor function.
   • Parietal Lobe: Processes sensory information including touch, temperature, and spatial orientation.
   • Temporal Lobe: Involved in processing auditory information and memory.
   • Occipital Lobe: Dedicated to vision.

1. Cerebellum: Located beneath the cerebrum, it plays a role in motor control, coordination, posture, and balance.
2. Brainstem: Connects the cerebrum and cerebellum to the spinal cord and is responsible for many of the automatic functions essential for life.
   • Midbrain: Involved in many functions including regulation of heart rate, respiration, pain perception, and alertness.
   • Pons: Plays a role in motor control and sensory analysis; some structures within the pons are linked to the cerebellum and thus are involved in movement and posture.
   • Medulla Oblongata: Controls autonomic functions like heartbeat and respiration, as well as reflex functions like swallowing, vomiting, coughing, and sneezing.

1. Thalamus: Positioned deep within the brain, the thalamus acts as a relay station, processing and transmitting sensory and motor signals to the cerebral cortex.
2. Hypothalamus: Located beneath the thalamus, it's involved in many functions, including the release of hormones, regulating body temperature, and controlling appetite.
3. Limbic System: This isn't a distinct part of the brain but rather a collection of structures related to emotion, memory, and behavior.
   • Hippocampus: Crucial for memory formation.
   • Amygdala: Plays a key role in processing emotions, especially fear.

1. Basal Ganglia: A group of nuclei linked to a variety of functions including control of voluntary motor movements, learning, habit formation, and emotion.
2. Pituitary Gland: Often termed the "master gland," it secretes hormones that regulate many processes including growth, blood pressure, and reproductive functions.
3. Pineal Gland: Produces melatonin, which helps regulate sleep patterns.
4. Corpus Callosum: A broad band of nerve fibers that connects the two hemispheres of the brain and allows them to communicate with each other.
5. Ventricles: These are fluid-filled cavities in the brain, containing cerebrospinal fluid, which provides cushioning for the brain and delivers nutrients while removing waste.
6. Reticular Formation: A set of interconnected nuclei in the brainstem that's involved in regulating wakefulness, sleep-wake transitions, and filtering incoming stimuli to discriminate irrelevant background stimuli.

This overview, while detailed, is still a simplification. Each of these brain parts consists of multiple sub-regions with specific functions, and they all work in intricate networks rather than in isolation.